I have rarely consider myself beautiful. I've always wondered why someone would want to be friends with me. I don't consider myself cool. I'm just a shy girl in the corner, who just wanted to be liked. I felt I didn't have much offer or that I'm not that special. My friends, family and God over the past year have started to erode this thinking in my head. I'm starting to see a new me emerge. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. God calls me, his creation, good.  

This week, an elderly neighbor, who is mostly stuck at home, sat on the porch with his wife. I often stop and talk to him because he likes to practice his English (plus he was a doctor in Haiti and is really interesting). I met his wife this week for the first time in the two years that I've lived on my street. He's often talked about her and how she's been struggling. She has a lovely smile and as I tried to brighten her day, she brightened mine. She mentioned that her husband wanted her to meet me because of the kindness I'd shown to her husband. I'd made an impression. My gift was my time. Their gift to me was the realization that came much later. I was a gift. 

Slowly, I'm coming to terms with the fact that outwardly I'm not perfect. Never have been nor will I ever be, nor will anyone else for that matter. Perfect isn't what makes something beautiful. It's the polished surface marred with age and hardships. Beauty and perfection are not the same. It's the chiseled character that makes someone beautiful. It's being as we are with those beautiful blemished scars decorating the surface of who we are that defines where we've come from and who we are. That in and of itself is truly beautiful. I've always thought that I wasn't seen as beautiful by anyone else. More and more I'm realizing that no, it's I that am not opening my eyes. I need to let myself be beautiful, the way God made me. God sees me that way. Why can't I? In not believing God, I've devalued myself. So today, I'm walking a little taller because I choose to let myself believe God. I'm letting myself be described as beautiful. To let myself be beautiful.